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[14 Nov 2008|01:12pm] |
Okay, so there's this site where you can do mad lib poetry, so last night Michelle and I filled in lots of poetic-sounding words and created several poems which had many very poetic-sounding lines and took a bunch of the parts that sounded good and used all this free-verse style shit and merged everything together into an ACTUAL POEM. It's actually, like, hilarious. Liek it's actually a poem. From fucking mad libs. Hahaha it was the most hilarious and wonderful thing ever, Michelle is the fucking best. We had also just watched Clueless and several episode of Sabrina the Teenage Witch..... so much good times.
Anyway. I was so amused at how much it actually turned out like a poem that I had to post it.
( Hannah and Michelle Write POETRY!!! )
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[05 Nov 2008|03:01pm] |
So I know I never wite in here, but this is actually an incredible moment in history.
YES WE CAN.
Sitting in the RVC TV room last night listening to that speech was the most inspired I've been in years.
It was really cool experiencing it HERE, too, because like 60% of the people in the TV room anxiously watching the results coming in weren't even American. It's incredible how much my Canadian friends care, and just makes it all the more monumental.
Rejecting the myth of my generation's apathy...GOOD FUCKING TIMES. So glad I bullied my mom into stopping by town hall on the way to McGill.
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[27 Apr 2008|02:22pm] |
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Okay so I know I never write in my lj but I visited McGill and Montreal on Friday and Saturday and I really need help processing because I have to make my college decision like …today. So input would be nice. W@LTIWTEBQKUWYSBXHJHIXHIOXQHOIQXH Okay. That was really long. Obviously you don’t have to read all that, but if you did, please give me input? I also just wanted to let my biffers know where I stood school-wise.
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| All These Things That I've Done... |
[01 Jan 2008|05:36pm] |
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don't you forget about me -simple minds |
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cause i never actually write in my lj and i want some form of documentation of 2007, here is a (somewhat but probably not really) brief summary of what i remember from each month....
and for everyone whos not gonna bother reading the rest, which is understandable, id just like to note that this year started with a death and ended with a birth, and started with me kissing a total mistake and ended with me kissing someone i love. that kind of makes me sentimental..
HOORAY FOR 2007. I pretty much already put my summary of everything at the beginning of the entry but.... basically i love you all and i think that 2007 was a good year... low points obviosuly but so full of love and i just feel like 2007 was overall a success. i like who i am. obvisously im still not perfect and my relationships with everyone arent perfect but everythings just like...legit and dynamic and real and happening and...i dont know. life is so strange to categorize.
HAPPY 2008!!! fucking 08. 08pinskyh. we are going to fucking graduate. im not ready for that yet, im not rerady to leave all these amazing people that ive built up my relationships with for so long and... i just love everyone, and thankyou for a wonderful year, lets make 2008 even better. make new friends but keep the old, and all that.
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| College Esssayyyyha;keefugeqklug |
[29 Sep 2007|03:05pm] |
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Across the Universe |
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Okay I haven't written in here in a billion years, butttt I need help making my essay shorter (and better).
So here it is:
Soooo yeah it needs to be AT LEAST 200 words shorter... anyone have any idea of something I could cut? And also any other comments/criticisms.... don't be afraid to give criticisms, I promise I will be very greatful and not offended no matter how harsh.
In other news, I am very stressed cause I'm doing a lot of Early Action applications and a few Rolling that I need to get in like really really soon.....ahhhhhhdkfjghdklfddfg. But Friday was completely lovely, Across teh Universe was wonderful, and tomorrow will be fun at least for a couple of hours cause there's a Downbeat rehearsal at lovely Kate's. And then I have to do like 2934829048239483 Euro readings.
Okaybye.
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| oh, how i'll feel like a beautiful child |
[17 May 2007|07:21pm] |
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i havent written in soooooooo crazy long. well i guess like a monthish actually, but like.... ITALY happened. im not even going to try to explain the breathtaking beauty of that country and trip and experience.
i think im just writing because i felt it was wrong that i hadnt written since before italy, and i needed some sort of documentation of this particular point in my life/ this year, because i dont want the next time i write to be the next time i feel shitty and go to livejournal to be emo. so basically i came to document the fact that im actually genuinely happy.
"im happy" entries are probably a little boring tho if theyre not like about something epic. i dont know, im not like feeling profound or anything, which is what makes good entries, im just.... content. i dont know, its nice.
down side: kind of failing school. yeah i should probably like..start my homework...
oh well. i love everyone, and i want everyone else to be happy. cause its like, when you're sad, as much as you love everyone and want the best for them, you're kind of relieved when others are sad too cause then you can relate and you also dont feel like the freak. but when you're happy, you kind of feel useless and a little guilty.
i dont know, i just really want to see everyone happy. you're all wonderful people. lets all be happy and have super fun parties all summer and bond like crazy.
infinite<3
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| SUCKIN TOO HARD ON YOUR LOLLIPOP (sounds dirty, and is irrelevant, but ive been singing it all day) |
[13 Apr 2007|08:42pm] |
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lollipop -mika |
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today was gorgeous, i love absolutely everyone, and WE'RE GOING TO FUCKING ITALY!!!
in short, life is just completely grand.
hmm whats happened recently... well ive failed to do like any homework ever. and i hung out with kate last weekend and that was beautiful as always. and today was lovely i went bowling (and to kmart to buy socks first) with molly and eric and then we went back to her house and i dressed up in a strange combination of mollys clothes. oh and the guy at the bowling alley wouldnt let us have bumpers!! we asked for them and he told us we were too old. dammit.
basically i just love my friends and im so excited to be in a gorgeous foreign country with my favorite people in the entire world.
and anything that might have happened at school during the past few weeks is compeltely irrelevant because i cant even remember any of it now. i think im gonna quit school and move to italy with all my friends. esther can come too.
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| monday monday |
[02 Apr 2007|09:37pm] |
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when you were young - the killers |
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so i have a theory:
IT IS ALWAYS MONDAY. always. every single day. i swear to god. like, we have all these memories of other days happenign, but they never actually happen. its like a groundhogs day thing except we dont realize it's happening cause it's liek this mass conspiracy of perpetual monday.
seriously, think about it. was it not JUST monday? because i came up with this theory last monday and then found myself once again in english class saying the exact same thing the next fucking day (or so it seemed anyway).
although i guess my theory might be a little disproved when i wake up tomorrow morning and its magically tueasday.... and i dotn care that u cant disprove something a little.
whatever, despite the intense mondayness of today, it wasnt too bad. i was just fucking EXHAUSTED all day, but like izzy mentioned, it was just physical and mental exhaustion not really emotional. and THEN i came home and took a THREE HOUR NAP and all was right with the world. and it's like 9:40 now and im so going to bed before ten tonight.
also, in jazz class, we were doing turning leaps, and the teacher took me aside and had me try them double time *beam* ... i always feel really lame when i feel good about stuff liek that in jazz cause im in like a really low level haha and im not actually like a dancer like all those awesome senior company ppl, but idk it still feels good to have like tiny bit of skill once in a while
hey check it out, i posted when i wasnt in a whiny mood. SUCCESS. (well except for the perpetual monday theory)
i love everyone. i also need to see more of everyone. anyone up for hanging out thursday and/or friday?
oh and its alos passover. which makes life suck quite a bit, but im not gonna think about that until i have to (aka next time i have a meal at hoem and it consists of nothign but fucking matzah)
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| send me on my way |
[27 Mar 2007|08:32pm] |
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.smdvbfhkvbg.akfdgvkr... what the fuck. is it. with this YEAR? everyones dying. its fucking ridiculous.
my mom just came in and told me about my Uncle Tom, who is not technically my uncle, he's my cousins' uncle on the other side. but those cousins live really close and we see them all the time and Uncle Tom lives with them so we see him all the time too and ive known him and seen him since i was a baby and basically he's like an uncle even though there's no blood relation.
anyway, he has als. and it's like super aggressive i guess, and my mom just told me he's going into hospis care, like tomorrow, which pretty much means he's like lost the ability to like even be cared for in a home and has like less than 6 months to live. and i mean ive known he's been sick for a few months, and everyone's been saying the disease will kill him, but you always still assume itll be like the kind where you somehow magically get 20 years you know? or maybe thats just my crazy naivete.
i dont know, but when my mom told me i seemed okay i guess so she left, and then i kind of broke down, and now im just like...augh i dont even know.
and i just keep thinking about my Uncle Brian (his brother), who is like this quiet but silly hilarious amazing lovable weirdo who cares SO MUCH about his family and like..that's his fucking brother. hes losing a SIBLING. i cant even handle that.
its just like fucking INSANE like why does this HAPPEN. i mean i get it, people get sick and die, its like natural and neccessary and whatever, but its so fucking RANDOM and like STUPID and like lskduygsljkfgslajkgasfjsdf im making no sense and am not helping myself and...gah. theres nothing like the world reminding you that you actually have no power whatsoever over the universe's handling of the people you love to make you feel really fucking useless. (and selfish for being such a wreck and so indignant when you're not even the one dying or the closest person to the one dying).
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[22 Mar 2007|09:13pm] |
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i have no fucking idea whats going on in chem, im screwwweeedd for that test tomorrow, and i also still need to do my math homework....
im psyched for tomorrow cause it will be warm and nikki and i are wearing some pretty cool outfits that we created today at my house in honor of "you're the one that i want" cause we're that cool.
what is WRONG with me lately? i HATE warm weather. but suddenly, recently, ive been so psyched for it. ive been so weird lately. not even tho, i mean other than the randomly liking warm weather, outwardly ive still been same old super-procrastinatey super-lovey super-tired super-weird super-oblivious hannah. but ive felt different. i dont know, that sounded like crazy emo didnt it?
i think this year has just all seemed really..useless. which is strange cause junior year is like..junior fucking year. like sats and all that. and in theory prom but of course we're deprived. i think its just like one of those times where you're supposed to be figuring out your future so you have to like look big picture at yourself as a person and everything and then i end up doing that thing where i realize that im really just compeltely boring and dont really have any specific talents or motivation or...i dont even know. all that looking big picture just makes it all really small and repetitive and useless and makes u see there isnt really much of an all at all. astronomy's gonna totally fuck with my mind next year./
im sorry, im not really sure why im being weird, im not even in a bad mood at all, my spirits are totally all lifty from my nikki-filled afternoon, i was jut like thinking about things in procrastination mode i guess. i dont know, i think i just really need to hang out with people this weekend (in between midsummer rehearsalness). and stop being dumb and cryptic. and also sleep.
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| skdasfgslakdhglskdga |
[19 Mar 2007|03:28am] |
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its fucking 3:30 am, and i still have half my essay to write. and also the lit crit to add in. and also the works cited. and also intense editing. and also my soul. and also im screwed.
my brain has turned to POOPOO.
(and so, consequently, has my essay).
why do i do this to myself? next time, i will not procrastinate.
no seriously this time. i wont. ill be good. ill get it done ahead of time.
(exceptiwontcauseisuck)
i need COFFEE.
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| And they can float above the grass in circles if they tried, a latent power I know they hide. |
[17 Mar 2007|09:27pm] |
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im not even going to try making this an acceptable "concert entry," izzy and lura and nora have already done spectacular jobs of letting u capture a glimmer of the amazingness of thursday night. basically..the shins...are amazing.... *desperately wishes she were eloquent*
but moving on to friday, id just like to clarify that i was not SKIPPING to avoid french or because of tiredness as everyone seemed to think, i was actually legitimately sick, and i actually would have rather gotten french over with and wornmybeautiful shins shirt and had a snowy friday with everyone, but instead i stayed home with ricola. that totally sounds liek im whining and asking for sympathy, but i honestly just wanted to clarify that i wasnt skipping.
i wish i had something insightful or epic or other than mundane to say.
well anyway, the shins are spectacular, and i dont know about you, but WE DO NOT FUCK AROUND.
happy st patricks day!
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| *cough* owww my throat.. *more cough* *die**snifflesniffle* |
[09 Mar 2007|12:35pm] |
ewww i feel rather shitty. i think the like ten sick people i hugged repeatedly somehow mysteriously transferred their disease to me. i probably cant go to the thing tonight, kate, but ill see how im feeling, and even then i dont wanna get everyone else sick...blah.
i also have my huge ass poetry paper due thursday (AND DO NOT REMIND ME THAT ITS ACTUALLY DUE NEXT MONDAY BECAUSE I HAVE A SHINS CONCERT THURSDAY AND WILL BE IN NEW YORK FOR A TOMBSTONE UNVEILING ALL NEXT WEEKEND SO IF I TELL MYSELF ITS DUE NEXT MONDAY ILL FAIL)
at least esthers coming home today. i can get her sick too. we can wallow in unhealthiness together.
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| reader before you condemn, pause |
[25 Feb 2007|11:25pm] |
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It was a cynical babe
Lay in its mother's arms
Born two months too soon
After many alarms
Why is its mother sad
Weeping without a friend
Where is its father - say?
He tarries in Ostend.
It was a cynical babe. Reader before you condemn, pause,
It was a cynical babe. Not without cause.
-Stevie Smith
Stevie Smith is devouring my entire life with this fucking poetry paper. I'm not entirely sure why I posted that one, I was just looking at it and I didn't really like it especially at first, I was just kind of like "Oh Stevie Smith being ironic again by mixing adult and child roles, this time making a baby cynical....cool..." but then at the end that "Reader before you condemn, pause" and then it repeats that it's a cynical babe. It addresses you directly and FORCES you to pause and think about it and be disturbed and appalled at the fact that the babe is cynical, when before that it was just a strange metaphor.
It's not even that I really liek the metaphor or the rest of the poem that much or the idea of a cynical babe, I just thought that was really cool how she forces you to pause and notice and care. Because I did kind of care a little after I read it.
This was a pointless post, but you know when you see something or experience something cool and you just wanna DO something about it? This was me doing something about it.
Okay it wasn't really that cool, it's just that it's 11:30 and I'm still working ont he first body paragraph of this damn paper due tomorrow so I felt the need to procrastinate...
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| oh dollege! |
[25 Feb 2007|03:25pm] |
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mmmm what an adventure! id list the various inside jokes and events and such of the magnificent new york college visiting trip, but i think kate and nikki already covered that... I LOVE YOU GUYS AND MOLLY SO MUCH AND THAT TRIP WAS BEAUTIFUL. but now im home and its 3:30 and i have yet to write my massive poetry paper.. or even come up with an actual thesis for it for that matter.
...i should probably get on that.
but its totally worth the fabulous week. (i bought shoes and a headband and a shirt and another shirty thing and a purse and life is good.)
i also worked out with MOLLYLOVE in the fitness center at the holiday inn two nights in a row. and we ACTUALLY HARDCORE WORKED OUT. i was so proud of us, my legs KILLED after all the treadmilling and elipticaling for a couple days tho. it was satisfying tho, and plus then we felt justified in our intense overeating.
....oh and we also visited colleges. i really liked syracuse. ithaca was pretty sweet too.
at the last breakfast of our sweet sweet trip we were trying to figure out our schedules for next year, and i realized im doing 3 APs, and thats on top of regular physics and trig which are gonna kill me. and im doing 3 history classes if u count peer mentoring in world history. i also dont have room for soc or gym, so im probably gonna do summer gym...
i also wanna get a job this summer. anyone know somewhere i could look or wanna look with me so i can work with a friend?
well anyway, my week was FANTASTIC, thanks for asking.
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| and i have a sister somewhere |
[17 Feb 2007|06:06pm] |
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sufjan |
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OH VACATION. you are most most welcome.
im chilly and my APUSH sweatshirt is dirty and my dad won't let me turn the heat up to 80 like i usually do. damn damn damn.
well im glad vaction is here anyway, but its sort of gotten off to a lonely/boring start. a lot of friends are away and its just me and my dad at home cause my sister and mom went off to visit my cousins in chicago. i didn't go with them cause i would have had to go right on my college trip the day after i got back, so i thought itd be too much. but now im kind of regretting it because it's not like im doing much at home anyway and i really wanna see my cousins... they're all younger (in chicago on my moms side anyway) but i adore being with them. and i dont see them as much anymore cause we stopped going to mexico in the winter, so now i only see them for like a week in the summer all year.
anyway this week was pretty nice. snow day, valentines day, a hilarious english project assignment (acting out the wife of bath's tale... hahaha should be fun, except i have to get up at like 7 to go film it), midsummer anthony lectures with nikki and kate and adrianna and nica, film club, yeah good stuff. i felt like i havent seen anyone in ages tho... which is ridiculous cause i just saw everyone freakin YESTERDAY.
im sosososo excited for the college visiting tip with nikki and kate and molly this vacation!!!! the only issue is that i get carsick and we're going in a minivan with seven people (kate's and molly's moms and kate's little sister are also coming), so that might be...uncomfortable. and its gonna be super weird going to long island and not visiting my great aunt and uncle. this is the first time ive been around there since they died. like when i picture long island, i picture their little cozy house filled with new york bagels and 30 different kaleidescopes and basement filled with the little furry toys that uncle leo sold and.. i dont know i just keep having to remind myself that that house is now empty and unoccupied and sold and a trip to long island no longer entails going there and seeing them. i dont know its just weird.
it also sucks that im not gonna be able to see esther even tho we'll be like relatively close to her. im not trying to be whiny because i totally understand that it doenst make sense for all of us to go visit her when its kind of out of the way and we dont have much time and im the only one interested in rochester. its just that its another reminder that i dont ever see her anymore. i probably wont even see her spring break because shes thinking about going with her boyfriend to the dominican republic. this is also my first vacation without her, cause she came home for the holidays, and i have no idea what to do with myself. every other school vacationive ever had in my entire life, there was always someone there to hang out with and go to far too many movies with and watch far too many dvds of the same show with and go to the mall and buy far too much clothes with and dance around the basement with in an attempt to get some excersize when we began to feel vacation fattening us. maybe thats why im kind of lonely already even tho its only been like a day.
im sorry, this entry was a lot more whiny and long and unneccessary than i intended. im actually not in a terrible mood, im about to eat ravioli with my lovely father and then head off to izzys for crazy fun. and, of course, its vacation.
happy vacation everyone!
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| let it SNOW |
[14 Feb 2007|05:29pm] |
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the broadway vday mix izzy made me freshman year |
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HAPPY VALENTINES DAY, MY PRETTIES!
I adore each and every one of you.
I have eaten nothing but loads of fudge and pizza all day long.
MMM, SNOW DAY SUCCESS.
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| sweet escape, sweet escape |
[11 Feb 2007|03:49pm] |
new icon! adorable, no? and near-to-valentines-day appropriate, of course.
im so sad that mattress is over. which is like...completely ridiculous, because i wasn't even in t he show or on an intewnsive crew, i just did hair and makeup so i was basically only involved for dress rehearsal and the show weekends. but the past two weekends have been pretty fucking epic, and i don't even know what i am going to do with myself this weekend. i love you all, you are all so incredibly gorgeous and talented, and the show was the fucking most ridiculously splendid hilarious masterpiece of amazingness EVER. crazy awesome job everyone.
well, now its sunday, oodles of procrastination, same old same old....
im psyched for vday, which is kind of lame since its not even like i have a boy or a solid romantic interest. the one person i did kind of have a thing with isn't really....happening i guess. like i finally started enforcing my principles/ultimatums and he backed off and now we dont really interact much. but im not even like upset about it, like at all, which is weird, so i guess after everything its just sort of...nothing. which is kind of depressing, but since it doesnt actually depress me, it doesn't really matter.
anyway, my point is, im in love with valentines day. single people tend not to be, but i just cant help but adore a day devoted to love. who cares if its basically invented by hallmark? i just take the opportunity to express love to everyone around me, whether it's romantic or not. i swear to god, if i had the money, i would send a carnation/singing valentine to everyone i know.
midsummer nights dream cast list is posted tonight i think. apparently they're gonna let everyone in, like even the people who didn't get called back, as like random fairies? augh, thats so dumb, my audition sucked and i know i dont deserve to be in the show, so id rather just like WATCH it and help with hair and makeup again or something than be one of like fifty completely lame and unneccessary extras mulling about. sooo yeah i don't think im gonna do it... but kate i really hope you get hermia that would be amazing and you so so so deserve it cause you are like RIDICULOUSLY talented, and adrianna i know you will get an amazing part too because you got called back for leads and everyone (INCLUDING MRS. POTTER) said your audition/callback was amazing, and you ARE amazing. and nikki, you totally deserve that speaking/singing like lead fairy you got called back for, you glow on stage and your singing voice is like the prettiest thing in the world. so yeah, good luck everyone, i'll be checking the cast list tonight for your names!
in other news, MOLLYKATENIKKI I AM SO EXCITED FOR OUR NEW YORK COLLEGE VISIT TRIP LJKGILGILGYG!!!!!!!!!!!
you know what else im excited for?? APUSH FIFTIES UNIT. i love the fifties. it's like another twenties, except with like the birth of rock 'n roll instead of jazz. social focus, pwnable test, rebellious youth, rebellious conformity, ephemeral/flawed prosperity, fashion, music, postwar disillusionment, actually interesting readings, yesss....
i should do my stalker paper now.
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| is that seat taken...PROCRASTNATION. |
[28 Jan 2007|06:33pm] |
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oh the weekend. the anti-productive weekend. friday was marvelous with molly and kate (and izzy for a short while)... there was delicious pesto bread and insanely backdated preteen magazines with endlessly amusing quizzes. mollys house is just a wealth of wonder.
saturday was drivers ed (SHOOT ME IN THE FACE) but then i went to lunch with izzy and kate and we had clam chowder and that wasnt so horrible. but then later we went to the concert at dannys place, and people were obnoxious, and people were thoughtless, and so basically we just ended up at the end standing outside hating people and being irritated at everything. but we sang "the lion sleeps tonight" over and over and had a frustrated embrace to console ourselves.
then i came home and talked on the phone for like four hours cause im pathetic.
today i continued to do absolutely nothing productive.... well i practiced driving with my dad. i went to a parking lto to practice parking, and i ended up doing alright and then parking at donelan's when we got there. i didnt hit any other cars so thats good.. and i went 50 for the first time... yeahi kno most peopel already like have their license lol but im still like WOAH IM DRIVING, cause ive always been terrified of it... like ive had this recurring dream for as long as i can remember where im behind the wheel with no idea how to drive and i cant find the break and people i love are inthe ca and there are peopel around me and im just terrified im going to kill everyone and myself. which granted, is probably just a metaphor, but its still represented by driving.
im in a weird mood. do u ever remember that everyone has different lives? that sounds really dumb and obvious, but dont u ever realize obvious things and realize that theyre really strange? but i mean itd also be pretty strange if everyone had the same life i suppose... but it just seems lonely sometimes. to be the only one being you.
im making no sense. i should go do homework so i can waste my life making myself feel simultaneously giddy and like shit on the phone later.
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chot_channah's journal